Taking the Mickey (badum-tsssh!)

M wouldn't believe me that 'Hey Mickey' by Toni Basil was about anal sex - until I sang him the deleted final verse:

You make your willy hard then you stick it up my bum,
You wiggle it around until it makes you cum,
Splash your chocolate milkshake all across my tum,
Hey Mickey!

Well, you never know.

Look, we're rubbish, okay? Everyone else is blogging about the Chilcot fiasco and CBB and so on, but we're keeping it real with puerile gags about retro pop tunes.

Although I will make one comment here about Chilcot; this is wot I done tweeted earlier: 'As a Feminist, my use of the word 'cunt' is always problematic for me. Well, my worries are over - I can now replace 'cunt' with 'Chilcot'.

'Nuff said.

We will be blogging properly this weekend, if only to prove that we're not the sorts of losers who start a blog and then don't keep it up. We're just the sorts of losers who are too lazy to post sufficiently, thank you very much indeed. If you're very lucky, I might include details of the new skit I am working on, about a Gangsta rapper with severe Asperger's Syndrome ("Once I have ascertained that the woman is question is indeed a working prostitute, I will pay her and, after she has removed her clothing and sufficiently aroused me, proceed to perform intercourse on her from behind and I will take the liberty of presuming that she is also enjoying the aforementioned intercourse without properly discussing her opinion on the matter". "If you enquire as to my preference for female buttock size and shape, after a respectable period of research and self-questioning, it would be remiss of me to not to confess to preferring a larger posterior"). But I probably won't.

E.